Whenever doing a physical activity in school, the teachers would usually pick two people to choose the teams. I was always left to the last.
I don’t have a single athletic bone in me.
It just seems that everyone is good at playing sports. They’re not awkward. They don’t almost kick the ball, their foot just slipping past the ball, or the basketball just hits the rim of the hoop, and then is ruled out-of-bounds as it drops out the court.
In elementary and junior high, it was a big deal because you were judged on your Olympic ability in kicking, running, serving, dunking, etc. But on the other hand, I am a fabulous spectator! Math and Gym were not slam-dunks for me. This contributed to my oddity, to being weird because having the naturally athletic gene is what helps with your popularity. But I just felt so out of it, and I still don’t understand the reasoning’s behind playing Ultimate Frisbee, and then afterward at a coffee shop or pub. If you want to socialize, just skip ahead to the pub and order food already!
But I’m not completely without game because I can speed walk!
I’m sure, I would probably monopolize the category of speed walking if they ever created it as an event at the Olympics. They haven’t to my knowledge, so I continue on my own.
So What Is My Superpower?
Often I get caught up in I’m no good, and no one sees me syndrome. But He who sees me remains silent with his hands clasped behind his back even on the most intensive days. When I am left on my own, I do find the ability to allow Him to remind me that it is Him that this is all for. That my days of belonging are over because I belong in and to him. Not that it helps all the time, but if I am reminded of my beginnings, and at some point, I will hopefully gain sight of His position in my life.
Somethings don’t make sense, but sometimes the interconnectedness of relationships between strangers, your friends, family, and enemies don’t make sense either. People are what I want to talk about, the same people who disappoint me can at the same time turn around and show me that they do listen. We’re all flawed and that flows into everything you do. A lot of the time we push away what is important like our feelings, our limitations, and struggles. These are the things we need to be honest about in relationships.
I’m a bona vide introvert, so typically, I spend a lot of time to myself because I feel drained by spending too much time with others. It’s easy to isolate myself because of my past struggle with depression and my peers, but as I was attempting to heal from it, I found or re-discovered that I like connecting with people on a one on one basis or even two to five people, but there’s a catch! When my time is spent conversing with others and is spent in the shallowness of today, I am exhausted. I crave a depth and richness of conversation and connection with another person that is hard to find.
Using my Superpower
Most people have no patience for the deeper things of life. I have found knowing my personality type has been an encouragement because it shows me what is normal for me. It has shown me who I am and that God really did know what he was doing. Even though sometimes I still struggle, I now know that my perspective isn’t necessarily wrong as I always would assume because others would not acknowledge the way I see things. Introversion and my typing is part of the map that is specific to how I think, see and process the world around me. It’s good, it’s really good. In fact, I have realized that who I am is what most likely kept me out of the popular group that I thought would make my life so much better!